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Last year at a conference I was talking to one of my mentors about how it felt to be in the final year of a PhD. Her reply summed it up:. Relationships are incompatible with PhDs, seems to be the conclusion. Put most simply, being the partner of a PhD student largely means accepting that the Thesis is the biggest part of both of your lives , and is a far bigger player in how your relationship goes than either of you are. But how does that translate to dating?

There are a lot of advice-to-students articles about how to maintain relationships, but how does that translate for the single Grad student? Rest of the time spent hopping from one existential crisis to another, oscillating wildly between a range of contradictory emotions and over-thinking. Living on almost no money. Eating cold leftovers for a week without anyone noticing. Killing plants. Writing abstracts. Rewriting abstracts. Missing deadlines.

Deconstructing the patriarchy.

Dating in academia